The Battle of the Ages

God said that it was not good for man to be alone; he would create a helper suitable for him (Genesis 2:18). The creation of woman began the first human relationship and “naked and unashamed,” they were completely transparent and open with each other. Unfortunately, it didn’t last very long. The serpent came along, tempted Eve and mankind fell to sin; the rest is history as they say. Adam was right there with Eve during her interaction with serpent and Larry Crabb’s book, The Silence of Adam discusses males’ proclivity towards silence when they should speak up and/or their tendency to push their own agenda. Women tend to have their own agenda also and the war between men and women has been raging ever since.

Mankind’s fall to sin, the rejection of God’s plan affects every aspect of our lives. Blame, avoidance of responsibility and hiding feelings appeared very quickly as the woman blamed the serpent and the man blamed; not only the woman, but God for their poor decision. The “curse” – not God’s proclamation of the way things should be, but the consequences of the fall are what I call the Battle of the Ages – the battle between men and women, husbands and wives. The curse for the woman was that her desire would be for her husband and he would rule over her. For the man, the curse meant that he would have to toil for his food and only by hard work would he eat for all the days of his life. This brought about great tension between man and woman; the reaction has been for women to manipulate to get their way while men tend to push their agenda through intimidation and physical strength.

This not what God wanted, but what we too often see in relationships today. One does not have to look far to find disrespectful, manipulative, nagging women and/or domineering, stonewalling, disengaged men. It seems that the majority of marital relationships today are characterized by one or more of these attributes – it is the curse of sin – the selfishness that has plagued mankind throughout history. Marriage tends to be about what one’s spouse can do to make a person happy and take care of him or her, rather than the relationship of transparency, openness and giving that God meant it to be. What can you do to reflect more of God’s plan in your marriage today?